Wednesday, October 28, 2026

ANTINOUS DIES AS A MORTAL
RISES AS A GOD AT THE FEAST
OF THE BENNU PHOENIX



ON October 28th we commemorate the tragic death of Antinous in the Nile in October 130 AD. October 28th is also the Egyptian Day of Transformation into the Bennu Bird. 

This festival is the conclusion of the Mysteries of Osiris ... a festival which Antinous and Hadrian witnessed in Hermopolis during the final days of the mortal life of Antinous. 

They had already visited the Shrine of the Bennu (phoenix) Bird in Heliopolis Egypt. 

Now in Hermopolis, during the passion play, Antinous and Hadrian see how Isis and Nephthys search for and finally find the body of Osiris. 

Then, using the Scroll of Thoth from the sacred library at Hermopolis, Isis raises Osiris from the dead and transforms him into a spirit which can pass from the Underworld into the world of the living.

At the end of the Festival of the Passion of Isis and Osiris, Antinous plunges into the Nile under mysterious circumstances. Grieving Hadrian proclaims him a god ... he is worshiped throughout the Empire as Antinous in the form of Osiris. And Antinous is worshiped as a lunar deity. 

There is a spell of Transformation in the Book of the Dead, Chapter 83 (LXXXIII): 

I fly up and out of the Primeval Waters 
I come into being as the God Kheper
I am the Bennu, the Soul of Ra,
and the guide of the gods in the Tuat.
I become a Shining One, 
I am Mighty,
I become sacred among the Gods,
I am the Moon God
who vanquishes all darkness.


The OBELISK OF ANTINOUS speaks of Antinous becoming "a shining one" and also of being full of the "Semen of the First God" which is the creative force of the universe. That means Antinous can assume "any form his heart desires" since he (like Osiris) is one with the First God ... and one with the Bennu Bird.

Antinous IS the Phoenix.

THE DEATH OF ANTINOUS



ON October 28 the Religion of Antinous commemorates The Death of Antinous.

Near the village of Hir-wer, Antinous fell into the Nile and drowned.

There are those who believe that he was murdered, or that he willingly gave himself over to human sacrifice to prolong the life of his beloved Hadrian, or that his death was the suicidal effect of teenage melodrama, or that is was merely an accident, but there is no way to know, no way to be certain.

Grief-stricken Hadrian only said he "plunged into the Nile" but never elaborated on the circumstances of the death of his beloved.


Flamen Antinoalis Antonius Subia says:

We priests of Antinous do not take a definite position and leave the matter as an unknowable mystery. The manner in which Antinous died is not important, only the effect that his death had upon the world has significance.

On this day, we solemnly and silently mourn the Death of Antinous whom Hadrian loved and for whom he wept, and we sorrow for the loss of such great beauty at so young an age.

We pray for the Bithynian boy who died so far from home.

With his death, our religion was set in motion.

We lament and exalt in the grief of Hadrian that was so strong and so powerful that it spread to the whole face of the world, and affects us still today.

We pray also for all those homosexuals who have died in youth as a consequence of repression, we mourn the suicides, and commit them to the soothing arms of Antinous, who was assumed into the Nile for all of us.


It is one of the great ironies of history that, by dying dramatically, a  young person who was unremarkable except for his beauty became irrevocably bound with the most powerful man in the world. 

Emperor Hadrian proclaimed Antinous a God. He established a city on the bend of the Nile where the young man died — Antinoopolis. 

He named a constellation in the heavens after Antinous.

And without gentle Antinous at his side, Hadrian became an embittered and broken man. He became capricious and at times cruel. A reign which had been marked by Hellenistic principles of tolerance descended into bloodshed.

It is indeed remarkable how one young man, a commoner with no wealth or political influence, changed the course of history simply by dying. And the thousands of statues sculpted on orders of grieving Hadrian became the iconic image of Classical beauty — the last deity of Ancient Greece and Rome.

Antinous fell into the Nile, beneath the swirling waves, but when his body was pulled from the water ... a God emerged. Antinous is our God, he has accomplished the salvation of all lovers of his beauty. His is our salvation. He is Antinous the Gay God. He is the last pagan God of Classical Rome.

For centuries, he was worshiped in secret by gay men who were afraid to worship him publicly. Men such as Oscar Wilde and Walt Whitman sang his praises. When the Nazis marched into the offices of gay-rights advocate Magnus Hirschfeld in Berlin, they smashed a ceramic wall relief of Antinous which Dr. Hirschfeld had set in a place of reverence over the doorway.

And now, in the 21st Century, the "Most Great and Good God" (as he was known among his followers) is being discovered by a whole new generation of people seeking gay spirituality.


We dedicate our lives and our souls to fulfilling the Divine Hadrian's command to establish the Religion of Antinous for all who seek gay spirituality. We dedicate our lives and our souls to serving Antinous the Gay God.

Tuesday, October 27, 2026

ANTINOUS AND THE SCROLL OF THOTH
BY WHICH ISIS RAISED OSIRIS
FROM THE DEAD



AS we commemorate the death of Antinous on October 28th, we need to remember what likely transpired during the hours leading up with his demise and deification.

On October 27th Antinous and the Imperial entourage were in the ancient city of Hermopolis, the Sacred City of Thoth/Hermes during the celebration of the Death and Resurrection of Osiris.

We believe that the spiritual forces of this occasion, and the Mysteries divulged to him by the Hermetic priests of the god Thoth, were the inspiration for this ascension into godliness.

The Passion of Isis and Osiris was played out annually in Ancient Egypt and formed the cornerstone of the Egyptian belief system, a belief system which taught that you could die horribly and tragically and yet you could be revived and restored and in fact you could become a god.

Sacred players acted out the roles of Osiris, his murderous brother Set and his faithful consort Isis. It was through the magical spells contained in the fabled "Scroll of Thoth" that Isis brought Osiris back from the dead.




At Oxyrhynchus Antinous had seen just how potent the magical spells of Isis were.

The festival of Osiris celebrated at Hermopolis and observed by Hadrian and Antinous commemorated the rending of the body of Osiris and the searching of Isis for each of the parts.

We believe that something of a cathartic nature happened within the soul of Antinous at Hermopolis just before he plunged into the Nile on the opposite bank across from Hermopolis.

We will never know precisely what happened. Did Antinous get a glimpse at the fabled Scroll of Thoth? Did some Egyptian magician-priest teach him a bit about spellcasting? Did Antinous perhaps believe that he could use a spell to prolong Hadrian's life?

The Egyptians believed anyone who drowned in the Nile would become "a deified Osiris". Some Egyptian magical spells call for the magician to "deify a scarab beetle" -- which means to drown it in Nile water and thus make it sacred and magical.

We will never know for sure what happened as a result of the ceremonies on October 27th, the last day and the last sunset of the brief mortal life of Antinous. The sun would rise on October 28th and, although the mortal Antinous would die, there would never be another setting of the sun for Antinous the Gay God!

FLAMEN ANTONIUS SUBIA tells us:

Like Osiris, Antinous descended into the Nile, and arose to bring the blessing of eternal life to the world. The Religion of Antinous, like the body of Osiris was scattered over the face of the world, and we who worship him, are like Isis, gathering the fragments together again.

Hermopolis was the last city that Antinous ever saw, and the Passion of Osiris was the last religious ceremony in which he took part. Certainly it was here and at this time that an Awakening occurred, dark in its implications, causing Antinous to relinquish his life.

But it was of splendid power in that, from the death of the boy, a god emerged. We observe that in Hermopolis, the scattering of the body of Osiris was the moment when the sperm of the blessed one was planted in the immortal spirit of Antinous, Our God.


The Sacred Nights of Antinous begin tomorrow ....

Monday, October 26, 2026

HOW DID ANTINOUS DIE? AND WHY?
By Our Flamen Antinoalis Antonius Subia



I go over this question again and again,
I haven't stopped wondering... and quite honestly,
I still don't know what to think...about how Antinous died.
Any possibility is probable...even Human sacrifice.
The ancients alluded to the rumors...so anyone who repeats them
...is being a scholar.

Dio Cassius suggested (or rather claimed) that Hadrian
Had the body of Antinous cut open for the examination of his organs,
Not to find the cause of death, as in an autopsy
But to examine the organs...for divination.
These were the organs of a god to be.

Horrible, and macabre
but why wouldn't Hadrian have every inch and morsel
Of his beloved Antinous examined and studied,
...Treated like sacred jewels from the depths
Of the most beautiful corpse?

I think we are all in agreement that,
The Body of Antinous was very likely Mummified.
That it was not buried in the earth...like a Greek of a Christian,
Nor laid in the tomb, covered in oil and herbs like a Jew
Nor burned on the pyre...like a Roman,
But that Antinous was very likely given the burial rites
Of an Egyptian King...a fashion still popular
Among the rich Hellenistic- Roman Nobility.
We have all seen the fayoum funereal paintings.
If you could afford it...you would be given the very best version
Of an ancient Egyptian Royal burial,
Your Body would be preserved to the very best of Mummification
Possible at that time...not quite as well as the ancients, but basically well preserved.

Hadrian, I imagine, paid top Sesterses
To have the Body of Antinous treated with the greatest and most sacred respect
Due the highest of kings
The best of the best were brought to Antinoopolis to Mummify the body of Antinous.
It seems very likely to think that the Roman Augurs,
Who were always part of the court, would want to examine
The organs of Antinous, before they were preserved in salt and nitron,
And gain whatever spiritual significance they might reveal,
...like a sacrificial Animal.
Why wouldn't they want to know if there was anything to be known
From the lobes of his liver and spleen,
Ridiculous as it may sound to us now,
And scandalous as it might seem to a Roman...and especially to a Christian.
Why wouldn't they make their examination,
Before his beautiful organs were dried and placed in their eternal alabaster urns?
Hadrian would have wanted to know why.

Maybe the slander came from the fact that his organs were examined,
Like a sacrificial lamb, or a bull.
Many of the coins of Antinous have a bull or a ram on the reverse,
Perhaps because Antinous was the "Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world."
In slanderous minds...some would say
That he died..for no other reason than to be examined,
...as though Hadrian slit his neck.

Antinous threw himself into the Nile...he died,
But even Hadrian had no idea why,
Hadrian only said that Antinous fell,
...if we are going to be scholars,
The ancient suggest that he drowned to prolong Hadrian's life,
Or rather...if Hadrian represents the Empire,
Then Antinous died for the benefit of the Roman Empire.
Dio Cassius, in his effort to belittle Hadrian,
Made the death of Antinous out to be a sacrifice to Hadrian's vanity,
But avoided the relevance of Hadrian's life to the benefit of all Romans.
If Antinous gave his life to prolong the life of Hadrian,
He was actually giving his life...in human sacrifice,
To prolong the benefit that Hadrian had brought to mankind,
To the whole of the Roman Empire.
If it was suggested to Antinous that by the sacrifice
Of that which was most dear to Hadrian,
That Hadrian would continue to live beyond his natural years,
If Antinous Loved Hadrian...as I feel that he did,
And if Antinous believed in Hadrian...what he meant to the world,
What he had done for Rome...for all mankind,
And what he could do in the future,
If someone were to suggest that through his own death,
Antinous could benefit Hadrian and ensure that Hadrian would continue to reign,
Do you think that Antinous would hesitate?

Of course he would hesitate.
There was more involved than we know,
Something happened...there was some kind of separation of the heart.
Antinous would have found some other way to benefit Hadrian,
With his life...by living...unless there was no other way.
If Antinous gave his life as a human sacrifice,
It would have been a very extreme psychological despair
That led him to take his own life...what could that have been?

Knowing what I know about Love,
I would say that it was simple acts of cruelty
That led to the end of Antinous.
Hadrian must have treated Antinous in a cruel manner
leading up to that sacred night in October of 130.
Antinous must have felt worthless to Hadrian,
Ruler of the Known World,
Hadrian might have said something that pushed Antinous
Over the edge.

Antinous was only a boy of 18 or 19,
Full of emotional turmoil,
The slightest word from Hadrian
Might have set Antinous...full of teenage hormones,
into an unbalanced, irrational state,
in which he was capable of anything.

Their relationship had no equality,
Hadrian was ruler of the world,
Antinous was nobody...a pretty boy
With thousands of rivals, an Empress who probably didn't approve,
And a rival in Lucius Verus...Antinous was harassed
On all sides by everyone who had something to gain,
And then there was that person who suggested 
That if Antinous gave his life,
That the reign of Hadrian would continue.

Hadrian cried as woman because he knew the real reason why 
Antinous died...Hadrian knew...and he cried...because he knew.

There must have been a final moment between them,
A final goodbye....that left Hadrian full of regret,
Our Religion is founded on Hadrian's regret


I think Antinous drowned for his own personal reasons,
He fell into the Nile by accident,
Maybe he was drunk,
Maybe he was suicidal...drowning off a boat is
A hard way to kill your self on purpose,
But there are others who have slipped into the river
And drowned...who were considered gods.
Who knows...rivers have no answers.

In Antinous...I feel that he gave himself to the Nile
He gave himself to such an extent that he died,
Whether by accident.... drunk...or visionary,
Antinous died in the Nile...he drowned.

So why do we worship him?
because Antinous is the god of the gays
There is no other gay god except Antinous,
Find fault in H.I.M. if you wish,
But Antinous is great and strong....
For those who see and know HIM,
There is no such thing as weakness,
Nor strength.
~ANTONIUS SUBIA

Sunday, October 25, 2026

OPEN YOUR EYES TO WEIGHTLESSNESS
DURING THE SACRED NIGHTS OF ANTINOUS



THE Sacred Nights of Antinous are fast approaching: The dark nights between the death of Antinous (28 October) and his Triumph over Death (31 October). 

This is a magical Space/Time event when the veil between the worlds is lifted. (Painting by RYAN MARTIN.)

This magical event is known by many names: Halloween ... Samhain ... Día de los Muertos ... All Saints/Souls Day ... it is also when we change the clocks (in most countries) ... an hour forward in some places ... or an hour backwards in other places ... the time displayed on the clock is unimportant ... your location in the Time/Space continuum is unimportant.

This Shoegazer video by Washed Out, which is a favourite of Antonius Subia, best illustrates what happens to each of us during the Sacred Nights of Antinous.

We become "Weightless" ... as the Time/Space boundaries between Dreaming and Waking evaporate ... we see waking life as a dream ... we "dreamscape" our dreams to make them real ... we see the world through the eyes of Antinous ... we see Antinous in the eyes of all around us ... the Ancient Priests in Rome see through our eyes ... we see through the eyes of the Future Priests on distant planets ... we see through the eyes of Antinous ... for whom all dimensions are HERE and NOW.

You open your eyes and see through the eyes of all your incarnations ... past incarnations ... your present incarnation ... future incarnations ... all simultaneously ... bundling and harnessing all the spiritual power from all your incarnations (and all the difficult lessons) in an illuminating flash of insight ... A moment which is eternity.

You become weightless. You take the leap of faith ... HOMOTHEOSIS ... Gay-Man-Godliness-Becoming-the-Same ... the same leap of faith that Antinous took when he plunged into the Nile on 28 October 130 AD.

He did not take that leap of faith in order to die ... he took that leap of faith in order to fill his lungs with the Semen of the First God ... in order to transcend Time and Space ... so that all moments in Time are NOW ... all points in Space are HERE ... so that he can LIVE CONSCIOUSLY.

It is his gift to each of us. All he asks is that we open our eyes to it ...




Saturday, October 24, 2026

MARBLE SLAB AT HADRIAN'S VILLA
COMMEMORATES SACRED LIGHTNING STRIKE


Archaeologists excavating at Hadrian's Villa near Rome have unearthed a rare marble slab bearing an inscription that provides a new understanding of the religious rituals that took place in the ancient retreat built in the Second Century A.D. by Roman Emperor Hadrian. It reads FVLGVR SVBMANIVM ... the "lightning bolt of Summanus," god of nocturnal lightning ... indicating that the UNESCO World Heritage site was the spot of an ancient lightning strike.

The discovery was made during excavations conducted by the Department of Humanities (DISTUM) of the University of Urbino Carlo Bo, under a concession from the Italian Ministry of Culture and directed by professor Fabio Giorgio Cavallero.  

"In Roman belief, a place struck by lightning was immediately considered religiosus, having been consecrated by the deity itself," says Alberto Samonà, the director of the Istituto Villa Adriana and the Villa d'Este, which collaborated on the excavation. "The traces left by the lightning were ritually collected and buried, accompanied by appropriate rites and sacrifices."

Antinous was nearly struck by lightning. It's true! Not just a legend, but historical fact. It happened atop MOUNT CASIUS in Syria at the September Equinox in the year 129 AD. Hadrian, Antinous and the imperial entourage climbed the mountain to offer sacrifices to Jupiter/Zeus. At the top, a bolt of lightning struck the altar, killing the priest and the sacrificial animal. Was it an omen? Antinous died a year later!

Friday, October 23, 2026

THE SCORPION GODDESS SELKET
GUARDS THE TOMB OF ANTINOUS



23 October is the feast day of the Egyptian scorpion goddess Selket/Serqet ... on this day the Sun enters Scorpio. When Isis went off in search of the body of slain Osiris, she left her baby Horus in the protection of Selket ... because everyone knows scorpions are good mothers ... scorpions carry their babies on their backs. Selket is the guardian of Horus and ... by extension ... she is the guardian of Antinous.

23 de outubro é o dia da festa do escorpião deusa egípcia Selket / Serqet ... neste dia o Sol entra em Escorpião. Quando Isis saiu em busca do corpo de Osíris morto, ela deixou o bebê Horus na proteção de Selket ... porque todo mundo sabe escorpiões são boas mães ... escorpiões carregam seus bebês em suas costas. Selket é o guardião de Horus e ... por extensão ... ela é a guardiã dos Antinous.

23 de octubre es el día de fiesta de la diosa egipcia escorpión Selket / Serqet ... en este día el Sol entra en Escorpio. Cuando Isis fue en busca del cuerpo de Osiris muerto, ella dejó a su bebé Horus en la protección de Selket ... porque todo el mundo sabe que los escorpiones son buenas madres ... escorpiones llevan a sus bebés en sus espaldas. Selket es el guardián de Horus y por extensión ... ... ella es el guardián de Antinoo.